10 Things You Need to Know About Sex After 50

​​Let’s face it, we’re not getting any younger (chronologically anyway), and sometimes we aren’t as flexible as we used to be.  Perhaps you’re not as juicy as you once were.  Our skin might not be as taut as it was, we might be carrying a little extra insulation, and we might be struggling with changing hormone levels, kids leaving the nest, and sadly the end of a relationship, for whatever reason.
 
So to help you along your way, here are 10 things that can help you enjoy sex more after the age of 50.

1. Make it fun!!  It’s so easy to get into a rut, doing the same things with the same person (if you’re with your longer- term mate that is).  Try different positions, different locations but make sure you’re both on the same page first.
2. Date night!  When we’ve been with the same person for a period of time, it’s so easy to get into the routine of day to day living, we forget to go out on dates!  Leave the phones at home (or in your purse and focus on each other.  What if you’re not with someone steady but rather have a friend with benefits (shocking, right 😉)?  Go out on a date before having fun. 
3. Use lube!  Chances are you’re not as moist as you were when you were in your 20’s and 30’s.  That’s no reflection on you as a woman but rather a change in hormone levels.  So get a good, CLEAN, natural form of lube from a health store and PLEASE stay away from K-Y!!  You can also try taking vitamin E (400-800 IU) per day provided you don’t have any health issues.  If you’re taking medication, please check with your pharmacist.  Brands I recommend are Genestra, New Roots and Natural Factors.  And don’t forget to drink lots of water 😊
4. It’s so important to stay as physically active as you can and yes, that includes stretching.  Collagen helps prevent joint pain and curcumin and Boswellia are great natural anti-inflammatories.  Sex can get a little … intense when it’s done right … so you need strength, flexibility and endurance.  This is especially true for your male partner 😉 
5. Your libido might not be strong and that’s okay.  Everyone is at a different stage in their life and libido often ebbs and flows.  I will say one thing though.  If you are in a relationship and your partner wants sex regularly and your sex drive is low, I would suggest investigating why.  It’s likely stress; unbalanced or low hormone levels.  This is my specialty and I’m happy to help you.  You don’t want sex to be the cause of a relationship breakdown.  Make sure you TALK to your partner 
6. Maybe your man is the one with the low libido.  Yes … believe it or not, it happens 😉  If your man seems to have lost interest in sex, please don’t take it personally and NEVER, EVER berate him for not being able to get it up or keep it up.  It happens.  Instead, talk to him and make sure he gets checked by a doctor.  It could be as simple as stress or low testosterone.  These are fixable. It can also be a warning sign that there are problems.   If you’re having relationship issues, that’s a different story and not my purview. 
7. If you’re single, please do NOT give up on sex!  Masturbate ... either with your fingers or use a sex toy regularly if you don’t have a partner (or even if you do) to keep you lubricated and enjoying all the benefits of orgasms.  You know, stress management, immune system health, lowers blood pressure, lifts mild depression, improves bladder control by strengthening pelvic floor to name just a few.
8. Keep an open mind!  This ties in to #1 above.  Speaking of tying into things.  Why not try a little light restraint?  Blindfold perhaps?  Ice?  Heat?  Try something new.  If you don’t like it, don’t do it again but don’t dismiss things because you THINK it’s not your thing.  I refused to try something for 20+ years.  When I finally did I discovered I love it!
9. Don’t put any pressure on yourself.  Whether it’s dryness, lack of sex drive, lack of stamina, a little extra weight … whatever … don’t beat yourself up.  If you’re rejecting your partner, PLEASE let them know it has nothing to do with them (unless of course it does) and explain it’s how you feel about yourself. 
10. Finally … you’re NEVER too old to have a great sex life!  You do have to work at it and make it a priority though.    

Well there you have it ladies.  10 things you should know (and do) when it comes to sex over 50.  It’s really not that different than when you were younger … just a few little tweaks and you’ll be enjoying orgasms regularly and be much happier for it.
 
If you or your partner have any challenges with regard to sex and hormones or if you need new toys, please feel free to reach out to me.

Sandy O'Shea is a Certified Nutritional Practitioner ... helping women get their sex life back through proper nutrition and  balancing hormones.  Learn more about Sandy and get her 12 Tips for spicing up your sex life - by visiting her website Stepping Stones Wellness Inc.

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